Dining with Style: Rules, Conversation and Respect

When we think of table etiquette, our minds often go straight to cutlery, glassware and posture. These elements are, of course, important, and the rules do matter. However, what truly makes a difference at the table is the quality of the conversation.

The ability to engage in conversation at the table is a key aspect of Social Etiquette, as well as Business and Cross-Cultural Etiquette. It is around the table that relationships are developed, trust is built, and people come to know one another. Many professional opportunities arise during a lunch or dinner, in an atmosphere that may feel more relaxed, yet is, for that very reason, particularly subtle.

Conversing well at the table does not mean speaking at length, but rather knowing how to contribute with courtesy, discretion and awareness. It involves listening attentively, avoiding interruptions, not dominating the conversation and, above all, choosing topics that are suitable for everyone present.

Another important element naturally comes into play: a broad general knowledge and an awareness of current affairs.

Those who travel, read and take a genuine interest in the world will always find appropriate and engaging topics of conversation, from travel and culture to cities, events, books, exhibitions, traditions, professional experiences, gastronomy and cultural differences.

By contrast, those who speak only about themselves or introduce overly personal or controversial subjects may unintentionally make others feel uncomfortable, even if their table manners are otherwise impeccable.

For this reason, in international settings, I often say that true elegance at the table lies in the balance of three elements:

• an understanding of table etiquette 

• a refined sense of conversation

• respect for others and for different cultures

  
  

When these three elements are in harmony, we can truly speak of elegance.

Because at the table, we do not simply show how we eat, we reveal who we are!

EDDA